Monday, January 2, 2012

What Sisters Should Be

Assalamualaikum and geetings :)

Hey. It's 2nd day of 2012 (I type this at 3 a.m). So, what am I gonna type in this post? Haha. I'm gonna tell you something about my beloved sister, Syaza Syahirah Rosli. :)

Yeah. I know it's quite bored to read story about my sister. But, should I care? She's my sister and I love her so much and and and this is my blog, so I can post on anything I want. Haha.

I was eating maggi mee with her just now and suddenly I thought that this little girl has grown up. Haaa. I didn't expect that. Yeah, she's gonna study in secondary school this year. I also realized that I have left her alone for almost 5 years. I was in boarding school and I left her alone with my family. I realized it just now, and I felt so regret about that. I didn't realize for all this time, I have a sister which I should take care of.  Now I realized that she has grown up. Am I being a bad elder sister to her? :(

Sometimes I asked myself why I get a sister who is 5 years younger than me? 5 years is such a big gap.  I always dream of having sisters like Fais Nurnajwa and Hazwani Ummairrah, or even Alia Muspauji and Afeefa Muspauji. Because I think siblings which have "jarak umur yang dekat" will have such closer family relationship. But then, I think Ummi Najihah also has a sister and her sister is 10 years younger than her, but yet they are really close. Yeah, like I've already said, it's all my fault.

My sister and I have our own characters. I am such a graceful person from the outside, but in the inside I am a very strong girl. I have such strong spirits and high passion on something. Meanwhile, my sister, she looks like boyish from the outside, hahaha, but in the inside, she's very sensitive. Like most of people say, "dalam hati ada taman" Haha.

My mother always compare each of us. Yeah, I'm good academically but I lack of living skills. While my sister has it on the other side. So, yeah BEING COMPARED is such usual thing for us. Sometimes I am jealous looking at my sister who can cook well, can socialize well and being such easy-going person. Every kid loves her so much. Haha. Me? Naa. I have only few friends, I don't cook well, and kids are scared to me. Huhh.

Sometimes when my mother comparing me to her about academic, yeah I feel satisfied. I said to myself like "Haha. I am better than you lahh adik." But then I learn something from Fais Nurnajwa and her sister, Hazwani Ummairrah. Hazwani has good achievements in her academic. I can admit that she is better than Fais Nurnajwa. Haha. Sorry Fais. I still remember when it was Appreciation Night of MJSC Taiping which to celebrate students who have pointer 3.5 and above. Fais volunteered to iron her sister's baju kurung. Can you imagine that? If I was in Fais' place, I would be so sad and super duper jealous. But she's fine and support her sister well. So I think, this is what sisters should be.

I also remembered the days I always laughed at my sister because of her wrong pronounce of English words, I always condemn her on her studies and on anything she likes instead of giving her courage. What a bad sister I have been.

I also remembered the day when she got her UPSR result which is not really good. She didn't want to talk to me. From that, I realized she should be so stressful especially to face me. Everyone kept asking "Kenapa kakak boleh, adik tak boleh?" And maybe she did say something in her heart that everyone cannot even listen like, "Kakak lain, adik lain." And I try to think what would I feel if I was in her place. I suddenly realized that for all this while, I have been such cruel sister to her. I didn't even listen anything that she wanted me to listen. 

From that day, I realized everything. I love my sister and I don't want anyone to hurt her, even comparing us.

Once, I laughed at her because I heard that she wants to be a CHEF. But now, I realized, I should listen to her and say, "Go ahead with your dreams. Adik kakak memang pandai masak. Someday you will be such a great chef. Kalau ada orang perendahkan adik, beritahu kakak. Haha" 

So, this is some additional to my 2012 resolutions;

Haha. Y'know what. I'm crying right now. Haha. I remembered also the days I told stories about my sister in front of my classmates and yess I was crying at that time. Haha. If my sister knew about this, she's gonna laugh at me. Hahaha. She shouldn't expect this. Haha. But the truth is, yes I love her so much. So so so much. She's my friend, always be. :')

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