Fuhh *inhale exhale* I was exhausted. A productive day I could tell. Woke up early at 5, managed to make du'a in my bed because it's one of the place where my deep thoughts can be exploded out. Haha.
Alhamdulillah He eases me during today's exam. Some of questions I could answer but some are not. Hee. Then, research meeting with my group. Blablabla ohh got the chance to study tafsir surah An-Nisa'. Lots of detailed hukum being mentioned there. Take time to digest. And as usual, reading Reclaim Your Heart, which again and again soothing me and knocking this heart.
Ohh ohh ohh one of my housemates gave me a link on video of tafsir ayat al-quran by Nouman Ali, titled "Boyfriends and Girlfriends" which caught my intention. His explanation about human temptation is absolutely correct. Nabi Yusuf a.s trapped by a pretty woman who is actually his boss. Instead of fulfilling his temptation to the beauty of Zulaikha, he chose to stay pure. And by that, he tried to protect himself. Even Yusuf yang handsome mampus pun pilih to stay pure, kita yang tak berapa cantik ni sepatutnya lagi senang to stay pure. But most of the time, the conditions change. Senang sangat engage to someone totally. Dah lah tak cantik, tak stay pure pulak tu. Tak malu ke? Kan? *sobs* So thanks so much housemate for such a lovely reminder. :)
I spent the rest of the day with Syaira, as she seems in need of help. Besides, she's one of the factors that keep me to stay strong. Guess what people say that "kata-kata tu doa" is indeed true. Syaira always says that I am a really strong. So, I feel inspired by her du'a (words), unconsciously I am strong, not forgetting the strength is only from Him. Thanks boyfriend! Haha. I really like spending time with Syaira lately, because the more I talk to her, the more I remind myself to God. Guess this is the exact meaning of love for the sake of Allah. By seeing or talking to a person, we feel closer to Him. (skill pikat Allah for today: checked!) Subhanallah!
One thing that I realized is actually, I really love a person if they say that they love me, I will feel shy. Just like how I feel when Syaira said she loves me hahaha. I feel shy to say "I love you" to my family and my close friends, therefore, they are the ones who I really love. So, basically I don't know exactly what feelings I have time dengan Izzemal cause I don't feel shy to say anything like that. So, I found myself!
I spent the evening with Syaira, talking about future, deep thoughts, deep conversations. It was awesome and peaceful. And Syaira likes it when I talk about the content of Reclaim Your Heart. And me too, like to talk about it to her. The more I give, the more excited I am and the closer I feel to God. Lovely!
Till the next post. Got last paper tmr! Daa! :)
"Sesungguhnya taubat di sisi Allah hanyalah taubat bagi orang-orang yang mengerjakan kejahatan lantaran kejahilan, yang kemudian mereka bertaubat dengan segera, maka mereka itulah yang diterima Allah taubatnya; dan Allah Maha Mengetahui lagi Maha Bijaksana" (An-Nisa':17)
Me, Myself and I.